Aaron Rodgers needs a new nickname

Long time, no update, and much apologies to anybody clamoring for some new posts. The ball has been dropped like a pass from Eli Manning. Though, that would be an interception. Oh, and on that note, (expletive) me and my fantasy teams that have led me to draft Eli Messiah. What a flipping joke.

But by banking on Eli so much on my NFL.com and NFL Network leagues, this will give me a chance to start referring to him as Eli Messiah, so this could be a good thing.

In any event, the lead story today is that we need a new nickname for Aaron Rodgers. My Suggestion? Thunderlips, based on his new mustache. Spread the word people, this should really catch on.

Some links for you guys to catch up on.

• Of course you knew I would have to weigh in on this Lane Kiffin deal, right? Here it is.

• Time for some players to pay me back for a years of pain.

• Did you know that I write a near-daily fantasy column, too? Well you can check out this one about -- who else -- Peyton Manning.

• This is weird, my proclamation that the Cowboys are missing the playoffs has not drawn much heat at all. That is weird.

• One more thing, check out my show, NFL.com Fantasy Live. We are on both NFL.com and NFL Network. But you can check it out here.

America!

Wait, what ... Eli really said that?

Eli Manning believes that he is in Tom Brady's class. Whether you believe in something like that or not, I was glad that he said it, because it has been a long time since I had the chance to write some stuff on Eli. So this was a pretty good day for me.

You can catch the six things that Eli also believes right here. The NFL being a family site, I was unable to use the basic, "Believes that Casey Anthony is innocent," or "Believes that O.J. is looking for the real killers." You know the basic.

• Oh, and if you have the chance, you can check out the six people you would not want to have with you if you were stuck in an elevator. Oh look, that also worked its way into another Manning-diss. I am killing it today.

• My take on Ndamukong Suh was rather genius, too. Even for a guy who is not considered one of the "football guys."Seriously, this is the kind of stuff that the Lions should be doing. If I was one of the Ford Family, I would be so rich I would not care about stuff. I would also pay any fine that Suh incurs.
  

• Oh look, I got some on-air stuff working, too. This is about me being the "expert of the experts." Take a look.

America!

This advice will cost you one Schrute Buck

Excuse the lack of updates last week, as I had a huge show at the Brea Improv on Thursday. Sold out show at the Brea Improv, and it was a gasser. Thank you to everybody who came out, it was a blast.

We will start out this week, with some fantasy advice to The Office's Rainn Wilson, who has the third pick in his fantasy draft. Hopefully, he takes my advice.

Some things you may or may not have missed over the last week.

• Six things we learned over the weekend.

• Six things more believable than Favre is going to stay retired.

• We got The Miz on the Dave Dameshek Football Program.

• And here is some straight talking football.

If you guys can, please subscribe to the Dave Dameshek Football Program via iTunes. Listen once, download twice. Seriously, just downloading would be awesome.

The Post Mortem: Did he mean it?

Was Deion Sanders sincere in his Hall of Fame induction speech? That is the question often asked of me.

And my answer is yes.

But remember, I also love professional wrestling, so I might not be the right person to ask. I made a Pick Six of my favorite moments from the Hall of Fame, but they wouldn't let me say Deion reading the name of his kids as my favorite moment, so I'm not linking to it.

Monday's Pick Six: Guys who stuck it to their former team by signing with their hated rival. Props to me for the John Lackey include.

Here is my take on the rookie I am looking forward to watching this week. Notice the comment section, I am the only guy who gets called out. I know I have seen a couple of our CMs (and have even seen a CM reference or two) trolling there. Take the time to sign up, because I would find it hilarious.

America!

The Weak Ender: Anne Hathaway new Catwoman

Are we alright with the selection of Anne Hathaway as the new Catwoman? I am down with it. Actually, I'm digging it. The thing that would make it better is if Hathaway's penchant for nudity would make it into this film. What was the name of that Romcom where she spent a lot of time naked? I never saw it because even that seemed like too much to sit through to she here. But I would be willing to sit through the latest Batman to catch a glimpse of her.

Here are some links to get you through today.

Road trip! The Dave Dameshek Football Program makes a road trip from Pittsburgh to the Hall of Fame. There is plenty of hooey and applesauce as the host likes to say.

And look, it's a bonus podcast with Marcus Allen, be sure to listen.

More Marcus Allen: Let's get Damon Allen in the Pro Football Hall of Fame. It is the "Pro" right.

Even more Marcus Allen: At least he's on my side here on the return of football to Los Angeles.

Well, my opinion might be here eventually. Keep checking back.

America!

O.J. Simpson on two greatest lists

O.J. Simpson is in the top-five of two special lists -- and neither one has to do with getting away with murder. No, Simpson is one of the greatest running backs ever, and he is also one of greatest NFL actors to portray a policy officer.

And with the passing of Moses Hightower, here is a look at the six greatest leaps from the gridiron to on-screen cop.

There is another list that was put together when trying to figure out Marshall Faulk's place among the all-time great running backs. He has to be behind Simpson here, too, right?

America!

Getting hit by the Bus

Well, I have already had to swear off one former Los Angeles running back, so why not one more? Jerome Bettis agrees with Eric Dickerson’s assessment that the NFL should not return to L.A. Thankfully, Bettis is raising money for concussion awareness as part of the Pace program.

You can read the story here.

• Today’s Pick Six: Ultimate Dream Teams, including the original Dream Team. No not that one, the other one. (Don’t worry, it will all make sense to you when you click on the link.)
  

• Ray Lewis said he would kill for an ice cream cone. Let's hope it does not come to that.

• Jermichael Finley sure can multitask. Check out this grab.

America!

We have bush!

Justin Verlander called Erick Aybar's bunt attempt to breakup his no-hitter in the eighth inning "bush league." Even though Verlander's own manager Jim Leyland was cool with it.

What really is "bush league" is throwing the ball away on purpose. Which is what it appears that Verlander did when he tossed Aybar's bunted ball into right field. Amazing how somebody can be so in control, yet throw the ball so wildly.

The who incident inspired this Pick Six about possible unwritten NFL rules that we would love to see.

Also on Monday:

• Jets coach Rex Ryan might have the worst tattoo of anybody who isn't rushing a fraternity this fall.


• How will you remember Randy Moss? And what team will you remember him with? I will always remember him for being upset that his posse wasn't allowed on the field prior to the 2000 NFC Championship Game. Oh, and running over a cop.


• The Tweet of the day is right here.
  

America!