Thursday, March 03, 2011

The Weak Ender: BYU would not approve of Merriman

Well, I guess we can't blame Shawne Merriman for making an ass out of himself for chasing around WWF divas such as Maryse Ouellet. But we can blame me for not saving it for The Weak Ender.

Now I am expecting an email or text from Mark D. telling me that the TWE chick should have been the Bella Twins.

Yep, that was a pretty flimsy opening. But this is what I get for getting a jump on the news.

THE JETS released Vernon Gholston this week, and the Raiders let go of Robert Gallery, parting ways with two of the biggest busts in the team's respective histories. But who has had the worst luck drafting players?

The Jets have Gholston, Johnny Lam Jones and Blair Thomas. The Raiders -- and just looking at quarterbacks -- have had Todd Marinovich, Marc Wilson and JaMarcus Russell. This one isn't even close, right?

The Jets get made fun of during that ESPN montage during the draft, but the Raiders have really struggled with the draft picks. Here is something that will make you sick. From 1985-87, the Raiders passed on Bernie Kosar, Earnest Givins and Bruce Matthews. Of course, hindsight is always perfect and you never know how those guys would have done with the Raiders, but it's always fun to speculate.

One you can't dismiss, though, is when the Raiders picked Marinovich, the Falcons drafted a quarterback nine picks later. You might have heard of him, his name was Brett Favre.

Man, he would have been the perfect Raider.

MOTLEY CRUE and Poison will be together again for a first time this summer in what promises to be a pretty awesome tour. My only regret is that I am unable to grow some air out in order to spray some Aqua Net into it.


This is going to be a fairly lengthy rant against the Mormon church. If you are easily offended, or just don't want to put up with my (expletive), that's understandable. You are free to keep it light here. And really, I try to keep politics out of it for the most part. But I have to say this. And if you know me, and who I have lost in this world, you will understand where I am coming from.

BYU made a big statement with its honor code this week, suspending center Brandon Davies for knocking up his girlfriend. Imagine that, a center getting booted off the team for penetrating the hole.

Well, at least we won't have to worry about the Cougars making a run in the NCAA tournament now.

BYU and the Mormon religion has taken a beating this week. And why not, it's fun to bash those whose opinion differs from our own. Especially when they are against the very things we hold dear such as boozing, (expletive), and fighting. So we should castigate those who want to live differently than us and have different value systems.

Although, I fail to give any sympathy for the Mormon church because it was the LDS who funded Proposition 8 in California. So while all of the Jimmer fanatics cry about those of us who continue to make fun of their honor code, know you know those consenting adults -- who you don't want to get married -- feel.

Actually, you don't. You see, the Mormons are free to practice their beliefs and even have a school that oppresses the future Planned Parenthood bombers of America. Those Mormons will go to church on Sunday, give 10 percent of their earnings to ensure that some consenting adults in this country are not free to practice their beliefs.

And that is the difference.

It is times like this, when BYU is a laughing stock that I can really feel God's love and know that he's on our side.

Sorry for the soap box, but it's something that I feel strongly about. And having the BYU basketball team lose a few games won't make up for the hatred and fear that the Mormon church has propagated over the years. But for a brief time it will certainly make me feel a little bit better.


R.J. said...

Thanks for this post. The Mormons also used lobotomies to treat homosexuality as recently as thirty years ago, which is more evil than anything the Roman Catholics have offered recently as a cure.

King Scott Walker said...

I am uncrossing my eyes a moment to post an important announcement. Due to the refusal of the fourteen Democratic senators to return to Wisconsin, I am laying The Hater Nation off.

I suggest everyone prepare for this crisis by stocking the family bunker with plenty of wonderful Koch Industries products!

The Hatriot said...

Well, it's not like the Mormon church didn't admit Black people until 1978. Oh... wait...

Now, I know several Mormons. They are all fine individuals- generous of spirit, trustworthy, hard-working. So I've adopted the same attitude toward them that they and other bedroom-obsessed folks have toward gays: I love the sinner and hate the sin.

In short my Mormon friends, I feel about you much like you feel about the gay librarian/shopkeeper/mailman in your neighborhood. I genuinely like you. I recognize you as a brother or sister from the same creator and I wish you could free yourself from your destructive behavior. That mix of Masonic rituals, 19th century carny mumbo-jumbo, misogyny, racism and authoritarian politics you call a theology? I feel about it much the same you think about your neighbor's sex life. It's unnatural. It makes me queasy. I just can't understand why you won't give it up for something more wholesome.

In closing, our host is right. Not about the superiority of Mangoritas and Aimee Mann albums, but about Prop 8. You see LDS members, you have the right to believe as much gullible, backwards-ass horseshit as you like. That's as American as Calvin stickers and mobility scooters. When you use your collective economic and political leverage to deny people I care about their basic human dignity, however, you and your hive mentality can go fuck yourselves with a turkey baster full of Four Loko.

Pay per head bookie said...

I don't think that he should wait for the weak ended to enjoy a fine lady or two ladies.