Sunday, October 31, 2010

The Post Mortem: Kelly deserves jail

Anybody else have Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger treat their fantasy team like you were a coed in a college bar? Good lord, that was terrible. But there was plenty of crap going on in the NFL. Let's hit the lowlights.

THE DALLAS Cowboys have officially finished their season. There was some thought that QB Jon Kitna was going to lead these team on a winning streak, only to have QB Tony Romo return to ruin the whole thing. Like he always did. But Romo will not even get that chance.

THE MINNESOTA Vikings have also called it a season. How would the year have been different if that plane from Mississippi with Brett Favre in it back before the season started had flown into a building instead of going to Minnesota? The Vikings could have been playoff contenders if Tarvaris Jackson had started the season at quarterback.

THE DETROIT Lions are going to make the playoffs. I would say that the Lions were the best team in the NFC North, but the Packers did look pretty good knocking off the Jets. Wow, the Packers defense better than the Jets? That was amazing.

THE SAN Diego Chargers are not completely back. But they are closer to getting back into the race. Well, only if the Chiefs and Raiders would stop winning.

BOISE STATE continues to fall in the polls, as expected. But really, does anybody think that the teams surrounding them will continue to win? Think about it, another week and two undefeated teams fell. And more will continue to fall. Just embrace the Broncos, fools.

AND FINALLY

There was something disturbing about Notre Dame this weekend. Although, Tulsa showed a lot of class by wearing green shamrocks on its helmets.

But Notre Dame put on a pretty glowing show. Coach Brian Kelly certainly looked like he was bothered during the moment of silence for that student who was killed because of his negligence. Although, it was not hard but to notice that he seemed more distraught about losing the game.

My question, why was Kelly even coaching? We talk about NFL players returning to the field after committing rape. After running dog fighting rings. After killing pedestrians. How was this any different?

If anything, what Kelly did was worse.

Kelly put a few wins over a student's safety. And to think, Notre Dame went out and lost the game. Let's be honest. Notre Dame might not be a good fit for the bowl subdivision level. A classic FCS team if there ever was one. And they went out and killed a guy?

Coach Kelly deserves to be in jail, at the very least. Having a job is a luxury he does not deserve.

Monday, October 25, 2010

The Raiders are better than the Chargers



There is a billboard on the 110 freeway that proud states Bud Light: One Nation, One Beer while proudly displaying the Raiders logo.

What is great about the sign is that both the fine folks at Anheuser-Busch and the Raiders realize who their target audience is. Sometimes you just have to admit to the truth.

And in this instance, the truth is that the Raiders are a better team than the Chargers.

The Chargers have coasted through the early portion of the season way too many times, got lazy, arrogant and what you see is exactly what this team deserves. And really, this whole notion that the Chargers play their best football in December is rather overrated, too, considering that the playoffs are in January.

There are times that the Chargers make the Raiders look like a rational organization.

The Chargers played hardball with LT Marcus McNeill, and the running game never got off the ground.

The Chargers played hardball with WR Vincent Jackson and the team is pulling guys off the practice squad to start at receiver. Although, I might give the Chargers the benefit of the doubt here because Malcom Floyd is just as good as Jackson, so it was not a huge deal, but still.

Al Davis famously played hardball with Marcus Allen, but at least Davis had three Super Bowl titles under his belt. Not that Davis was right, but you can be this bold when you have a title history.

A.J. Smith? Not so much.

But do not worry, Chargers fan. Help is on the way. Smith and Norv Turner will probably be fired this year. And Jon Gruden will come in with full control of the organization. Gruden was good poaching the Buccaneers, a team that still had Super Bowl-quality players. What is he going to do with an organization that has squandered its talent?

Some how Gruden is going to come in and make this worse.

Oh, and if you need one final kick to the junk to really put this in perspective -- the Chargers chose to hire Turner over Rex Ryan.

Awesome.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

The Weak Ender: Not sure if you heard about Favre



Vikings QB Brett Favre was interviewed by NFL security this week. Now what he did might be somewhat weird, but as far as NFL quarterbacks go, sending a picture of your junk is pretty tame.

Eagles QB Michael Vick had an interstate dog-fighting ring. Steelers QB Ben Roetlhisberger allegedly assaulted an underaged woman in a bar. Sending a picture of your junk is like the NFL equivalent of jaywalking.

Call us when Favre is hiding in the truck of his car trying to get away from the police after having Cowgirl killed. Because until that happens, there is no reason to even bat an eye about this situation.

Favre was sexting.

And what is amazing to note here. Favre is a grandfather. And he knows how to sext with hot broads. My grandfather cannot even work the clock on his coffee maker.

I'm not even sure my grandfather even knows how to work a cell phone. This grandfather is sexting with Cowgirl.

The truth of the matter is that the Commish is likely trying to hit up Favre for sordid details and some pointers. And maybe Cowgirl's number, too.

LETS REMEMBER back when the Cowboys and Chargers were both playoff contenders. And you know what is crazy? Neither team is likely out of this thing yet. The NFL is so watered down, until a team is officially 4-12, there is no reason to believe otherwise.

However, if I was the owner of some team looking to make a coaching change, I would love to have a staff that had Norv Turner as offensive coordinator and Wade Phillips as defensive coordinator. That would be pretty nice.

BTW TEXAS, America is rooting for you. Put the Yankees away now. You guys have smoked them throughout the series. End any chance now. Although, it will be tough because the Yankees will not have that anchor Mark Teixeira weighing them down. So there is not automatic out in the middle of the lineup anymore.


And finally ...

Seeing that I missed last week, and if the Twins are still talking to me. But realize that the next month's issue of Playboy should have a Cowgirl spread. The magazine has a ton of photos because I just got an email to join their cyber club. So expect that to be coming soon.

Diane will be so thrilled.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A fan tried to kill A-Rod ... and they stopped it?



The security at Yankee Stadium needs to chill the f-out.

A deranged Yankees fan (as if there is any other kind) rushed the field at the House that Douchebags built, with the apparent intent to hurt, murder or maim Alex Rodriguez. And security stopped this?

Some how the underwear bomber made it on to a plane, yet this patriot was thrown to the turf like some schmoe. Come on guys, you need to let these things play out.

And really, with baseball ratings sagging the way they are -- with a potential Rangers vs. Giants World Series on the horizon -- the sport could use a boost that would come with the potential of A-Rod being bludgeoned at any moment.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

You never root for players to get hurt -- unless it is Mark Teixeira



For starters, you have to love it when bad things happen to bad people. The good news for the Yankees is that Mark Teixeira is out. The bad news is they will have to find a way to replace his .000 batting average in the lineup.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Photo of Seau's Car Going Over Cliff

Really, Oklahoma?

I was wondering where your dear friend WCT was in recent weeks, and then it all fell into place. Our esteemed Buckeyes fan knew his team would reach an epic FAIL at Wisconsin. Plus the impending BCS rankings were thought to have Boise State at the top. This was not going to be a good week for him.

Well cheer up. Oklahoma is at the top of the BCS standings. Although, that is not expected to last because the Sooners do not win big games. Like this week’s game with Missouri.

Oregon is also at the top, and the thought of a Ducks vs. Broncos title game is awesome, but it is not likely going to happen. Because Oregon never seems to be able to make that step to greatness.

And seeing that the SEC winner is going to have two loses, that dream of Boise State vs. TCU for the title game lives on.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Norv Doesn't Think Much of Tony Dungy



Colts coach Tony Dungy was critical of the Chargers on Sunday night. Particularly of the Chargers' special teams. But coach Norv Turner did not really take the criticism that well.

And I quote ...

"You make a comment and you see a team from afar and I understand his comment and I can relate to him. It’s probably how he felt when his players let Darren Sproles return a punt and a kick for a touchdown here on a Sunday night game or when Peyton threw six interceptions against us. I understand we have work to do and it’s like any head coach would feel after a game like that.

Oh, and my son didn't kill himself."


Alright, Turner did not say the last line. But this was still a pretty savage beatdown of Dungy.

Hey Raiders Fan, how many wins is that over SD in 14 tries?



Wait, how many?



I am still not getting it ... how many?




Right, one win in 14 attempts. That is awesome. And yes, Raiders fan. You can brag about all of the Super Bowls your team has won. Because I am sure that many of you have fond memories of the Raiders winning the Super Bowl title back when you were four years old. What a glorious memory that must be.

So congratulations, I guess.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Spurrier has his autograph on his visor?



South Carolina knocked off No. 1 Alabama but the big story here is that Steve Spurrier has his own autograph on his visor. You have to love that moxie. In fact, Spurrier has passed Keith Hernandez in the, "I'm Keith Hernandez moment."

Man, I like to imagine that Steve Spurrier has his pick of the South Carolina coeds. And after a night of leaving them satisfied, they wake up the next morning to find a Steve Spurrier autographed visor laying next to them.

BTW, with Alabama being knocked off, we are one step closer to TCU vs. Boise State for the BCS title.

Friday, October 08, 2010

The Weak Ender: That's it Favre?



So Brett Favre thinks of Cowgirl and that is all he has? Favre was probably saving his, uh, excitement for the news of Randy Moss' arrival.

And really, Favre had better have picked up Moss at the airport because he is the only thing that is going to save the Vikings' season. A motivated Moss is a good thing for Minnesota.

Not that Moss will be the savior who will put up huge numbers. But he will light a fire under Favre, who has looked a little flaccid this season.

Adrian Peterson will benefit, too. Probably the most of anybody. The Vikings were seemingly intent on ruining Peterson's life running him on nearly every play. Peterson was on pace to top 370 attempts, the magical number that dooms running backs for the rest of their careers. Moss should keep that extra defender out of the box, and open things up for Visanthe Shiancoe underneath.

And the bottom line, too, is that the Vikings are actually compelling now. I certainly would not have thought twice about missing Monday's game. Now I am interested to see how this will play out.

Plus there is the added bonus that this could rejuvenate Favre and have him thinking of a return in 2011. That is right, let the Favre Watch begin again in earnest.

AND FINALLY ...

The NFL has become a quarterback league, and look who are making starts on Sunday: Max Hall, Seneca Wallace, Jimmy Clausen, Ryan Fitzpatrick and Todd Collins.

Monday, October 04, 2010

Why don't you wear the ribbon?



Jay Cutler is the only player not wearing pink during breast cancer awareness month, and now after the Giants blitzed jim like Lawrence Taylor on a speed ball, the Bears quarterback is eating tapioca through a straw today. I don't believe in karma, but this is getting me closer.

Sunday, October 03, 2010

For those of you who believe in karma



Michael Vick was injured during Sunday's game against the Redskins, but was electrocuted at half time when he could not return to play.