Thursday, May 20, 2010

The Weak Ender: Fox Out of Transformers

Megan Fox (that's not her) is out for "Transformers 3" ... she's going to be filling in for Ronnie James Dio on the Rainbow in the Dark tour. Don't clap, that was a pure thievery from the Bain. Now Fox had some sort of blow up with Michael Bay during the previous Transformer movie, and you know, she should be careful. A few more diva moments, a bottle of Grey Goose and she could be the next Lindsay Lohan.

These broads need to learn.

But with Fox out of "Transformers 3," that means I have no chance of seeing it. Oh, don't worry, I wasn't going to watch the movie anyway. But now I can pretend there is a reason. And honestly, Olivia Munn (that's her) would be a better choice for that movie. We need a Facebook movement for that. As much as I loved Betty White on "Saturday Night Live," give me an Olivia Munn in "Transformers 3" page immediately.

“Saturday Night Live” does not have the best record for translating sketches to movies — aside from “Wayne’s World” and the “Blues Brothers.” Two others — “It’s Pat” and “Superstar” — drew about as many fans as your typical late-season Jaguars game. And let’s not even talk about “A Night at the Roxbury.”

One has to wonder though, what would have happened had a film on Da Bears Superfans been produced. Fans at this summer’s Just for Laughs festival in Chicago will get a chance to find out with a live reading of Da Bears Movie Dat Wasn’t (via the Chicago Tribune).

“Da Bears Movie Dat Wasn’t” will be a live reading of a never-produced screenplay, to star George Wendt, Joe Mantegna, Robert Smigel, Bob Odenkirk, Richard Roeper (as a narrator) and Mike Ditka (as himself).

The story: Da’ Bears have been sold, and the beloved Soldier Field is to be converted into all luxury boxes for the rich. And here’s the thing: This really was a screenplay, written back in the mid-1990s by Smigel and Odenkirk for Paramount based on characters from the “Saturday Night Live” sketch, said Smigel after the announcement Tuesday. It never got made.

Really? “MacGruber” gets made, but this awesomeness does not? Really, “Saturday Night Live?” Somewhere the “Lady’s Man” gets the green light, and yet this cinematic (just guessing) masterpiece never gets made. Disappointing. Honestly, “Coneheads” … ah, you get the point.

To quote a former SNL castmember John Belushi — “Road trip!” Seriously, a movie with Mike Ditka? The Academy could not overlook this one.

THE CHARGERS have released details on a proposed downtown stadium (via the San Diego Union-Tribune). The current proposal by the team would put a new Chargers stadium just blocks from PetCo Park, home of the Padres. Honestly, anybody who has ever been to a game at PetCo would likely endorse this idea.

Of course, it's not going to happen. Why delay the inevitable here, just move the team to the City of Industry or Downtown Los Angeles. That is going to happen. The way the Padres have bent over San Diego, there is no way a stadium for the Chargers is going to be approved. Watch, the Chargers, Vikings and Jaguars will all be playing here in 2011.

Oh, and the Raiders, too.

PACKERS QB Aaron Rodgers had some pressure replacing legend Brett Favre in Green Bay. But Rodgers does have the endorsement of another legendary Packers quarterback, Bart Starr according to the Green Bay Press Gazette.

Said Starr, “I think he is an outstanding quarterback, and they’re getting an even stronger team around him. I like his style, just everything about him. I think he executes the system, how they run their offense. I’m thrilled that they’ve gotten some offensive support around him. I think he’s going to be a great quarterback.”

Starr also came out and said that Green Bay is really cold.

IF YOU missed it, Brett Favre promised the Southern Miss baseball team that if it reached the College World Series for a second consecutive year, he would definitely come back to the NFL. Millions of football fans suddenly hated the Southern Miss baseball team.

And the bad news for Angels fans, Jared Weaver promised Long Beach State players that the Angels would make it back to the World Series when the Dirt Bags reached the College World Series. Damn it.

AND FINALLY ...

Buccaneers CB Ronde Barber told the Tampa Bay Tribune that he is wary of pursuing a career in television, in the wake of his twin brother, Tiki’s recent dubious publicity.

Translation, Ronde is saying that when he leaves his wife and baby mama for some 19-year old piece of (donkey), he does not want the whole world to know about it. He would rather slut around in the dark, or have people think it was Tiki.

8 comments:

DAWUSS said...

I think that film would be better if it were the St. Louis Rams instead of the Chicago Bears

Bokolis said...

Ronde is playing this golden under-the-radar opportunity to full and devastating effect.
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Because of the times at which they are played, baseball stadia are for downtown and football stadia are for the sub-urbs.

While it may be cheaper to build infrastructure for one locale, it is more beneficial- economically and for the continued development of the tax base city- to diversify locales of attraction points.

If the Hat PTB try to pump occupied structures, people and revenue into Downtown to combat the exaggerated drop in real estate (they) caused by (allowing) overbuilding, that is throwing good money after bad.

But, try telling that to the drill baby drill set.

Bain said...

Speaking of Dio, I just spoke with someone on the tour, and apparently the new lead singer is not going over well.

THN said...

That is a good point about building downtown. A lot of the "luxury" condos they were building are becoming Section 8 housing. The same thing happened to Anaheim around the stadium. A lot of those condos are now apartments.

My own selfish point is that it would be cool to have that NFL stadium down there because it is fun going down for Padres games. Although bars before baseball games seem a lot more enjoyable than football games. Because football should be tailgating. But it would be sweet to go down there for SDSU games. I could imagine the madhouse the Gas Lamp would be on Saturday afternoons in the fall. Maybe they would actually build some sort of fanbase or something.

THN said...

Bokolis, one question I do have. How is the Redskins stadium working out in the boon docks? I hear they want to move that back to the DC area.

Bokolis said...

Not being from DC and having limited knowledge and experience, this comes from the cheap seats.

It's the boondocks in the way- to use a NYC analogy- that the cool kids living in Brooklyn consider Queens the boondocks. But it's not really the boondocks.

Most companies not associated with the government apparatus are located in the suburbs and it's not all that difficult to navigate the outskirts.

Also, the stadium is built where the Bullets used to play, so it's not like people aren't conditioned to going there.
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I forgot about SDSU (Apple mentality = what's college football?)...you could almost get me to sign on. After all those years and money they spent chasing out the hookers, anything to avoid Section 8.

A madhouse Gaslamp is not for me. It seems like too many NYers (and not the good kind) have infiltrated in between my last two trips and...and...I always found the fishing better in PB.

THN said...

That makes sense. But I am just pulling for the stadium for the SDSU reason.

I like downtown San Diego, but beach towns are more my style. Maybe they could build the stadium in Ocean Beach or something. (Kidding)

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