Thursday, April 15, 2010

The Weak Ender: A Perfect Solution for Roethlisberger

Ben Roethlisberger, while looking for a way to rehabilitate his image, has announced that he will be playing in the U.S. Open. Ben just needs to make sure that he does not curse on the tee box, or else Jim Nantz is going to scold you for it.

But what is amusing is that many of those critical of Big Ben is that many feel that he should settle down and get married. How did that work out for Tiger Woods? I’ve long suggested he hook up with a Hollywood starlet. The kind of gal who would not mind getting it on in a bathroom.

So what is Lindsay Lohan up to these days?

Could you imagine a NFL version of Sid and Nancy? I think we need to find a way to hook these two up. They seem destined for each other. Is there any way to make this happen?

THE ZIP on Brett Favre’s passes may have dulled over the years, but his wit remains as sharp as ever.

Favre let his Vikings teammates know that he was thinking of them by sending all of the participants in the team’s offseason workouts a pair of Wrangler jeans, according to the Star Tribune.

“I need to break them in a little bit, they are kind of stiff,” punter Chris Kluwe joked.

Of course, the best way to loosen those jeans? Put your pants on the ground, pants on the ground. …

Hate on Favre if you will, this is damn funny. But some Vikings players have to be a little disappointed. While a pair of jeans are a nice touch, Favre also endorses TVs for Sears. Nothing says you love your teammates like a 46-inch flat screen in each locker. Now you almost expect to see new RB Darius Reynaud in a T-shirt that says, “I went to Vikings offseason workouts and all I got was a lousy pair of Wranglers.”

THE NHL playoffs started. And while I am disappointed that the Kings fell in overtime. If that game one was any indication, we are looking at a potentially great series. Go Kings, go!

GIANTS QB Eli Messiah is not too concerned with Osi Umenyiora’s recent proclamation that he will retire if he does not start for the Giants this season. The Messiah shrugged it off and told the New York Post that the problematic defensive end has “said some dumb things before.”

Could the FC be coming back to Los Angeles? Los Angeles Times columnist T.J. Simersconnects the dots and speculates that Stan Kroenke purchasing the remaining 60 percent of the team could signal that the team could be returning. I am waiting for my good friend Foo to nix this, but I am on Team T.J. with this one.

SORRY TO our dear friend, Diane. Your photo is coming.

THERE IS little doubt that the Jets have edged the Redskins to be crowned April’s champions. No team has had a better offseason than the Jets, who have acquired CB Antonio Cromartie, RB LaDainian Tomlinson and WR Santonio Holmes in the months following their loss to the Colts in the AFC Championship Game.

The Jets are also in the mix to add LB Jason Taylor in their quest to reach the Super Bowl. (Although, it can be argued that Cromartie and Tomlinson already played a big part in helping the Jets get to the AFC title game, as members of the Chargers. The duo are now just official members of the Jets now.)

But Pats NT Vince Wilfork told reporters this week that these games are one on the field. Or in New England's case, the video booth.



Diane said...

No worries. I'm slightly drunk having spent some time in a NYC sports bar with an ice strip running the length of the bar to keep your beer cold. Brilliant!

Maybe going to Yankees stadium Sunday. And if I do, I will be booing Teixiera.

Robbie said...

Someone should thank the budding Zapruder for shooting the LAPD training video.

The New York Dolls said...

Lindsay needs to pull it together a bit.

Diane said...

Oddly enough, Yankees fans aren't nearly as hateable on their home turf. Everyone at the game was super nice.

Do all the dicks move to the OC?

And the right field fence is ridiculously shallow.

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