Thursday, March 18, 2010

From the Archieves: Hey Dook!

The Hater Nation is proud to welcome back Pete Gillen to lead us in song once again at the start of March Madness.

Many of you may remember me, Pete Gillen, the former head coach, of the University of Virginia’s men’s basketball team. If not, you will recall, that I am a very emotional leader, and my New England voice sounds, just like, President John F. Kennedy, his brotha, and Mayor Quimby from, the television program, The Simpsons, combined.

With Mahch Madness set to begeen, I am here today, to tell you of the greatness, that is Dook Univahrsity, men’s basketball. It is hard not to know about Dook in Mahch. As I told, radio personality Jim Rome a few yeahs ago, Dook is Dook. They’re on TV more, than reruns of Leave it to Beavahhhhh… reruns.

Now, in an attempt to stay relevant, since the Beavah’s show hasn’t been in steady reruns for at least 20 years, I will bring to you an original song of mine, sung to the tune, of another current, popular number, Sir Paul McCartney’s, Hey Jude:

Hey Dook, don't feel so bad.
Take a bad bracket and make it bettah.
Remember to get off to a slow start,
Against a team that is the Play-In winnah.

Hey Dook, don't be afraid.
The brackets were made so you’d play no one bettah.
The minute you play a Top 25 team,
You’ll pray for Christian Laettnah.

And anytime you feel the pain, hey Dook, refrain
Don't blame your bad looks on Seth Currays’ mothah.
For well you know that you’re gonna loose yah cool
When you check out that Shelden’s even uglieah youngah brothah.

Hey Dook, don’t be ashamed
You get all the calls, but its for the bettah
But, despite of all of the help
You have no chance of beating the Tiguhs!

Hey Dook, don’t cut those nets down.
Try to survive in the tourney, like an 11th-seedah.
Remembah to let the refs and bracket committee into your heart,
As well as your coach, with a name with too many f-ing leddahs.

So find a ditch, and like Hurley, drive right on in
So they see that Singler ain’t no Laettnah.
And don't you know that it's just you, hey Dook, you'll do,
Youh on TV mohr than Leave it to Beavahhhhhh.

Hey Dook, don't feel bad.
At least Florida State didn’t make it, eithah.
Remember it’s not the color of your skin,
It’s hard to win without players like Battiah, Boozah and
Laettnah, Laettnah, Laettnah, Laettnah, Laettnah, oh!

Nah Nah Nah Na Na Na, Naaaa… Nah Nah, Nah, Naaaa, hey DOOK!

SING ALONG NAHW!

Na Na Na Naaaaah Na Na Naaaaaaah hey DOOK!!!

DOOK, DOOK, DA, DOOK, DOOK, DOOKIE DOOKIE!

Nah Nah Nah Na Na Na, Naaaa… Nah Nah, Nah, Naaaa, hey DOOK...

Nah Nah Nah Na Na Na, Naaaa… Nah Nah, Nah, Naaaa, hey DOOK...

Alirght, just the ACC fans now!

Nah Nah Nah Na Na Na, Naaaa… Nah Nah, Nah, Naaaa, hey DOOK...

Alright, just the Duke fans now!

Nah Nah Nah Na Na Na, Naaaa… Nah Nah, Nah, Naaaa, hey DOOK...

Everybody together!

Nah Nah Nah Na Na Na, Naaaa… Nah Nah, Nah, Naaaa, hey DOOK...

4 comments:

JD said...

HAHA.

Only one slight problem--FSU did make it this year. You could always change that to NC State (who walloped the Dookies earlier in the year in Raleigh).

buckyor said...

NC State beat Duke? Christ, even first-round NIT flameout Northwestern was able to take care of the Wolfpack. The ACC is one big donkey show.

The Hatriot said...

song parodies = comedy gold

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