Tuesday, January 12, 2010

USC Given Death Penalty -- Oh Wait, It Just Hired Kiffin

Some get USC athletic director Mike Garrett a white jump suit that he can wear during USC football games. Maybe some old grandmother glasses, too. Because Garrett has surpassed the old coot in senility, which could be the only explanation as to why he is taking sloppy thirds from Al Davis. The University of Southern California has hired Lane Kiffin. And if it wasn't for the biting cold in Southern California, I would check my calendar to make sure it was not April 1.

The whole thing is just baffling. I mean, when Al Davis says a (female dog) is crazy, you listen to him.

When first hearing the news, a couple of questions raced into my mind.

Why did Garrett not wait a few more days to see if Tom Cable was going to be cut loose in Oakland? Cable has NFL experience (even more than Lane), and he coached in college.

And second, what the hell is Garrett thinking?

Hiring Pete Carroll was a fluke. If the USC volleyball coach had not lured Pete's daughter to the school, there would be no USC dynasty right now. Now Garrett thinks that he can turn any former NFL coach into Carroll.

Yeah, Paul Hackett had NFL experience, too. How did that work out?

One thing that could excite USC fans is that Monte Kiffin and Ed Orgeron will bring instant credibility to the staff. And they also can provide some muscle should the players again try to extort cash from Coach Lunch Money. And this staff looks really good if Norm Chow returns as offensive coordinator.

The only problem being that Lane Kiffin is the coach. Even an empty-headed figure head would be enough to take down the Trojans program. In fact, Kiffin already has made his first recruiting infraction that the compliance office is looking over right now.

Alright, that was a joke, but you thought it was serious didn't you?

But there are some winners here:

Oregon. The Ducks will be the new Pac-10 dynasty.

Mike Reilly. He never wanted to leave, but got a new contract extension at Oregon State just because USC wanted him.

Washington. The Huskies hired the one former USC assistant with integrity.

Tennessee. How lucky are the Volunteers? Absolved of a bad hire after only one year.

Sports By Brooks. More Layla Kiffin sightings.

WCT. He must be having the time of his life right now.

And look at the bright side Trojans fans ... Kiffin already has a head start on losing to UCLA.

Oh, and this is a good point raised by Boston Sucks My Blog, but Al Davis was right about the Lane Kiffin. How does that feel?


The Bain said...

re L & T: "Coffee enigma?"
Maybe what you meant to say is that Peter King wants to give Brady a Maoke enigma.

On that subject, not sure if anyone else caught the shot of Wes Welker's date for the game, but I would knock the bottom out of that sooner than Sarah Jessica Bundchen. Then again, Welker probably is knocking the bottom out of that, as opposed to employing it for a beard.

The Bain said...

Apologies for back to back posts, but I think I'll be forgiven.

WCT said...

its like Christmas and my birthday all rolled into one...

THN said...

I think we found our Weak Ender girl. Outstanding work.