Friday, February 20, 2009

The Weak Ender

Danica Patrick had her tramp stamp airbrushed from her Sports Illustrated spread, as the editors of SI have good taste. Who was looking at her lower back? I was looking at her ... eyes.

Seriously people, they were doing her (and you) a favor. The year 1996 called and they wanted its trend back. Having no tattoos is the new tattoo of 2009.

Don't worry WTC, The Hater Nation is talking football this week. I know, you're all thrilled.

Michael Strahan is in talks to star in a sitcom. And that's just disgusting. How would NFL players like it if some untalented hacks with no formal training walked off the street and started playing in the NFL. Would Strahan have liked that when he was playing?

Well, Eli was his quarterback so that might not be a fair question.

And there's kickers, too. But there are people out there who have struggled for years to be actors. Taken classes, paid their dues and honed their craft. Yet, a guy like Strahan is given a TV gig because he's the son of Esther Rolle.

Here's the bigger question ... does anybody find him funny?

  • Santonio Holmes has been fined for using the ball as a prop in his end zone celebration following his winning touchdown in Super Bowl XLIII. Don't worry, those 15 yards would have made no difference. Why does the NFL want to keep reminding people that they do a horrible job of officiating? Is the league tired of all of the awesome press that Alex Rodriguez is getting and they wanted to let everybody know that while the players may not cheat, the refs sure do. Awesome.
  • Darren Sproles is going to end up being the highest paid running back in San Diego. And worse news for us fantasy geeks -- the Chargers will be going to the dreaded running back by committee. Sweet.
  • The NFL Competition Committee is considering tinkering with overtime. Would the NFL being do this if Gomer led the Colts to a playoff win while Philip Rivers and the Chargers never got a chance to score? No way.
  • Here's some receiver news. T.J. Houshtryiudfgjeh is going to end up in either Seattle, Chicago or Philadelphia. He's going to be a bust, people. Marvin Harrison is going to have to play for a new team. And no longer being Gomer's teammate, people will get pissed when Harrison shoots people now. And Anquan Boldin says that he's open to staying in Arizona. Meaning KWM might return. Yeah, the thought of trying to catch passes from Kyle Orton will scare anybody straight. Smart.
  • Nnamdi Asomugha is going to be paid among the highest quarterbacks in the league. That's right, quarterbacks. Leave it to the Raiders to think of a creative way to cost themselves a lot of money. Nice.
  • How are we already to the season finale of Psych? Easily the best show on television. Any show that references the Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff deserves that honor. Will Strahan's show do that? Not bloody likely.

All you have to do is have Raiders in your name to have a horrible organization. The Texas Tech Red Raiders were considering firing Mike Leach. Until the school realized that it would go back to being as relevant as Baylor if Leach ever left.

The school should have done everything in its power to ensure that Leach would stay with the school instead of antagonizing him. He will remember that the next time a bigger school comes calling.


Sun Devil said...

You didn't mention the most important sports going on this weekend. Across the nation, it is opening day for College Baseball.

Surely THN can't be fretting over Fullerton having a mediocre season while watching former manager George Horton tear it up at UO...

Go Devils.

Bain said...

A monster great deformed, that had one eye
Was full of hayre and had a naked head
Most strongly vayn'd, and the top, being red
He draweth forth, and in one hand,
Apt for sport,
He shaking of it stands--
Fap, fap, fap, fap, oOoh!

DAWUSS said...

Just remember, scars never go out of style, especially if they form the right way.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I'm surprised Al Davis hasn't tried to hire Leach. Like Al, he is a quirky outsider type, and like Al he enjoys the "vehrtical" game. Hell, Leach actually researches the history of pirates.

Who would you rather have -- a proven winner like Leach, who managed to make a program like Texas Tech into a national power, or a pretty boy like Lane Kiffen, who lucked into a powerhouse program like USC and thinks that his DNA makes him a coaching legend?

THN said...

College baseball doesn't officially begin until Cal State plays Stanford.

R.J. said...

Gun charge? Check. Over 30? Check. Future Hall of Famer? Check. Has one good year left in him? Check.

Marvin's going to Oakland.

Diane said...

the season finale comes quickly when you only make 6 new episodes.

other good choices - burn notice and life on mars

how can you resist a show where the one female cop is referred to as "no nuts"

WCT said...

Don't lie, you love tramp stamps. Living out there amongst those SoCal skanks you must see tramp stamps everywhere...

Bain said...

Ladies, the small of your back is prime real estate, one of the most alluring regions of your feminine form.

Think twice before defiling it with "Tap Out" and an arrow pointing to your fart tank.

Btw, my word was "pringr", but I don't play those clubs.

JSpicoli said...

Name one hoodlum in the past 10 years that has gone to OAK. Your rap and your TV is stuck on IDIOT ESPN. Pay attention to what is really going on and you'll see the cesspool resides elsewhere in the NFL. You are dealing in 30 year old stereotypes form a different era and yhou probalby drool all over yourself just like Berman. Go make up a nickname you weak puke

Javon Walker said...

I sure can't think of one.

Cole Ford said...

That rep is bullshit.

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