Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Super Bowl Buzz Kill: Chiefs

Do you think your team is going to the Super Bowl? Ha. Your team sucks. Why put yourself through the aggravation every year? The Hater Nation is here to bring you back to reality with the award-winning series, The Super Bowl Buzz Kill.

Why your team won’t win the Super Bowl: Kansas City Chiefs.

The Chiefs had one great player on defense last year – Jared Allen. So how did they reward his hard work? They sent him to a team that actually has a chance of doing something this year. Great for Allen, not so great for Chiefs fans.

You might ask yourself, how can the Chiefs expect to win the Super Bowl if they trade away the best player on the team? (Yes, better than Larry Johnson.)

The Chiefs don’t expect to win.

Maybe not ever.

Allen won a couple of games for the Chiefs last season all on his own. But what did it really mean? The team closed the year with nine consecutive loses and finished 4-12.

The Chiefs actually did the smart thing by trading Allen. Why pay him all of that money to play on a lousy team? They also should have tried to deal Johnson, too. (And hell, maybe they did.)

The Chiefs need extensive upgrades on both lines. They ignored the offensive line in the 2007 NFL Draft, despite the loss of Will Shields and Willie Roaf. But thanks to the Allen trade, they were able to land guard Branden Albert in the first round. That's a start.

The Chiefs used the fifth-overall selection on DT Glenn Dorsey who could be a dominant player like Allen was for the team. Add in guys like Turk McBride (a steal from last year) and Tambia Hall and there are signs of life on the horizon.

Temper that enthusiasm, however, because it looks like Brodie Croyle will be the quarterback. The guy looks more like Richard Dawson than Len Dawson thanks to that hair style. But the Chiefs are so committed to Croyle that there is a chance that Tyler Thigpen could end up winning the starting job.

Don’t worry, not many other people have heard of him, either.

The Chiefs also are looking at Devard Darling to start opposite Dwayne Bowe at receiver. Bowe had an impressive rookie season, but he is going to see more than his share of double coverage with Darling there.

So it seems that Carl Peterson’s 20-year rebuilding plan is starting to show itself. But sorry Chiefs fans, not this season.


(The odds of your team winning the Super Bowl, based on 1-to-5 Goodells. One being worst, five being best.)

Missed a team? You can click the Super Bowl Buzz Kill 2008 label to see the entire list.


Diane said...

No shout out to Tony Gonzalez? Dude, he's a local hero!

DAWUSS said...

I never did have us going to the Super Bowl this year. Maybe the playoffs if we're lucky.

R.J. said...

The Chiefs screwed up when they lost patience with Casey Printers. I only saw him play a few series last preseason, but he moved the offense and ran very well. At least now he's the highest paid player in the CFL thanks to Hard Knocks

Bokolis said...

The other team that won a fixed Bowl. The buzz kill is louder than the buzz ever was.

Brodie Croyle wishes he was Richard Dawson. Nobody got more sugar from midwestern broads than Richard Dawson.