Monday, January 21, 2008

The Post Mortem

Oh, brother.

Leave it to the NFL to end up with the worst case scenario Super Bowl imaginable. Not satisfied with letting Major League Baseball soak up the Boston-New York rivalry, the NFL had to return in kind with a highly unlikely Super Bowl matchup. As Super Bowl scenarios go, this one ranks only above a St. Louis vs. Oakland finale. And not by much.

There are two favorable outcomes that could happen here. Eli Messiah will lose the Super Bowl and America's Soccer Mom will have another kid that routinely gets beat by Tom Brady. New Yorkers will have too suffer the indignity that they are indeed Boston's female dog. The 1972 Dolphins will have to go away. Forever. And Junior Seau gets a ring.

The other is that New England will become the first team in NFL history to finish a 16-game regular season undefeated, but lost in the Super Bowl. The Sports Dork, Bill Simpson, will have to write a whining column about the NFL fixing the outcome and then gloat about the Celtics.

To be honest, there is a compelling reason to root for both teams to lose. The snap judgment says to root against the Messiah. Rooting for New York just seems evil. Plus New Yorkers and the media will spend the next two weeks convincing America that the Giants have a chance. Hell, you will likely have the majority of football pundits picking the Giants to win outright. That will only make it sweeter when they lose.

  • Lil' Hater's text message following the game: Know any good flight schools in the Phoenix area? Seriously people, we've never heard of the guy. We might need to get out stories straight.
  • How many parents are allowed into an NFL locker room after a game? Is this a common practice? Because America's Soccer Mom could mug for the cameras enough. You almost expected him to jump on the podium and scream, "How about that Eli!"
  • So this is what happens when you believe in Brett Favre. The running game just didn't happen for the Packers. The Packers actually looked like the team that was out of place in the frigid weather. Very strange.
  • Thankfully Peter King and John Madden won't have to choose who to verbally felate the most, Favre or Brady.
  • Props to Gorgeous George for making the call and nearly nailing the final score. Maybe now he can let Johnny California slide a month on his rent. You can catch George's radio show here.

SAN DIEGO HAS A NEW LEADER
Philip Rivers has become the unquestioned leader for the San Diego Chargers. Rivers was listed as doubtful for most of the week, but was able to go out and play. And he didn't play poorly. Sure, he threw two interceptions. That was one less than Brady. The Chargers players, no doubt, noticed that Rivers was out there playing, but LaDainian Tomlinson was on the bench. Yes, LT was the benched because of a coach's decision. And the truth is, the Chargers were better off without him. Still, Rivers emerged as a leader in all of this while, sadly, LT's legacy is going to take a hit. (Fair or not.)

  • One of Rivers' interceptions was the fault of Chris Chambers who had position on the defender, but still let the ball get picked. Chambers really needed to make that play.
  • The play-calling seemed a little bit conservative. But Rivers was limited because of his injuries, while not having LT is a little bit of a disadvantage. Michael Turner is good, but he's not that good. The Chargers might have considered going for a touchdown in one of those red zone attempts. But you can see the logic for wanting to come out of each possession with some points. And with the way Brady was coughing up the football, an interception return for a touchdown seemed plausible. The only sequence that was truly puzzling was punting while trailing by nine with under 10 minutes left. But it's not like the Chargers were moving the ball that well up to that point. There just comes a time where you have to admit the better team won.
  • Mike Carey will be officiating Super Bowl 42, becoming he first effeminate referee to call a Super Bowl.

AND FINALLY
Don't believe that you have heard the end of Georgia Frontandrearie. We need something to do over the next two weeks. Although, why we rightfully bash Frontandrearie, we need to make sure that the LA Coliseum Commission receives its share of the blame. The commission lost the Rams, screwed the Raiders (that's cool) and could lose USC. Which seems unthinkable. They probably even had something to do with the XFL. So while we continue to skewer Frontandrearie, let's make sure we save some of that scorn for the Coliseum Commission that has left LA without an NFL stadium, costing the city numerous Super Bowls and a professional football team.

7 comments:

DAWUSS said...

Think Jim Sorgi's Mom would ever be given that type of treatment?

Bain said...

"So this is what happens when you believe in Brett Favre"

Yeah, what a letdown after every sportswriter in the country had crowned the Packers the class of the NFC before the first snap of the season and uh...

Oops, forgot. That was your Cowboys. Sorry...

"SAN DIEGO HAS A NEW LEADER"

Wonderful. Let us poor, misguided Favre fans know when Rivers gets his ring.

Fletch said...

How dare you talk trash about Mike Carey. We're gonna have a conference call with "Guns" and figure out the best punishment for you.

I love that with the Giants making the SB, you'll have had what, 93% of their games broadcast in SoCal?

GorgeousGeorge said...

If Tynes could kick worth a damn my score would have been even closer. I'll have to be happy with my Vegas winnings. Favre just couldn't do jack without a running game. I hope he doesn't try to pull the same BS he did last season about retirement.

Rivers did what he could but in the end they just let too many chances go to waste. The thing with the Pats is that they now know the Giants are for real so I don't expect the score to be as close as their previous game.

Chris said...

Favre became Old Favre during this game - which was the worst thing that could've happened to them.

And I knew the Gmen were gonna win.

Go Eli.

Anonymous said...

I love that with the Giants making the SB, you'll have had what, 93% of their games broadcast in SoCal?

With Joe Buck calling 90% of them

Diane said...

While I'm willing to give LT the benefit of the doubt, besides THN, Deion Sanders is the mouth most appalled by LT's non-performance in the game - so you got that going for ya