Sunday, January 13, 2008

The Post Mortem

Yes, you lost Terrell Owens, but don't go kill yourself over it. Same goes for you, Dungy offspring. When T.O. attempted suicide last year, his spokeswoman indicated that he had $25 million things to live for.

But what about Tony Romo? As long as he's still with Jessica Simpson, it is obvious that he will at least have two things to live for. And damn, those are big reasons to live.

Cowboys fans across the nation would likely be inclined to finger Simpson for the loss. And they would probably blame her, too. But Simpson wasn't the one missing tackles or breaking off her route on what would have been the winning touchdown. She was just some bimbo looking for some cheap publicity. Though, you would hate to believe that the same woman who whored out her marriage for MTV would go for the cheap publicity of dating the quarterback of the Dallas Cowboys.

But instead of focusing on Romo's choking, or Owens' crocodile tears, what about the playoff record of Wade Phillips? Even Norv Turner has more playoff wins. Don't be surprised if he's already canned before you finish reading this post. As mentioned on Friday, Jerry Jones is hot for Jason Garrett and it wouldn't be that unprecedented to can a coach following a great regular season.

SHOW ME YOUR LIGHTNING BOLT
That Norv Turner sure can coach, right? The Chargers have gotten further than most people indicated. Hell, yours truly was figuring this team would finish 7-9 (but still win the AFC West). While he can't be considered a genius following two wins in the playoffs, this might be enough for us to forget that the whole Oakland thing ever happened. So you can look at his body of work in Washington and see that he never could quite get his team over the hump. But you can't help but to be reminded that a certain coach in New England also failed in his first coaching stint. But you would have to be a full-blown lunatic to make that leap and while this win was great, we aren't there yet. The net is full of people who make broad generalizations after only a few wins, instead of taking in the full body of work. Turner has done a great job so far, but count me as one of the few on the Internets who refuses to make a knee-jerk reaction.

In other words, keep winning, Norv.

The only hope is that the Chargers can show some of that toughness against the Patriots. They had it in 2005 when they ended the Patriots 21-game home winning streak. And they certainly have it against the Colts. (Just ask Reggie Wayne.) They just need to flex some of that muscle against the Patriots and not be intimidated.

PACKERS NOT PACKING
Yes, there was going to be a huge, "Brett Favre's choking extends to Ryan Grant" post readied for Saturday night if the Seaflakes would have won. But they didn't. In fact, the Packers really crushed them and those two gift touchdowns were the only offense Seattle could muster. Green Bay's defense is highly underrated and playing in the snow only makes them that much more dangerous.

However, yours truly is still going to need some time to figure out how Favre and Eli Messiah are in the NFC Championship Game together.

AND FINALLY
The early forecast has the high temperature at 19 degrees after a week of snow. Now, the common logic would be to go against the boys from Southern California. But which team's running game seems better suited for the snow? Add the fact that New England can't really stop the run that well, and you might have the makings of the biggest upset in AFC Championship Game history.

14 comments:

DAWUSS said...

If the Giants win a fixed game against the Packers, then you know the NFL is out to get Lil' Hater.


Also, the Packers in the Super Bowl next year sounds like a likelier option. Why? It'll be on NBC, with John Madden commentating and Peter King giving halftime analysis.

You people know how that game would go...

GorgeousGeorge said...

I can't help it, I'm rooting for the mangy old dog Favre. He always looks like he's having fun out there (copyright by the Madden Hearts Favre Society).

As for the Chargers vs the Pats...snowball, meet hell. However, if they do pull it off it'd be f-in' sweet. I want to see Brady spitting blood.

The Bain said...

First order of business... all of you THN Packer haters can put your pretty little lips to work on my mangy old dog DICK. That goes double for you, Yoko Romo, and I hope the caps on those teeth are insured.

Now to the matters at hand, starting with the most important... gambling. Hat has had the spread by the tits for 8 games straight and the Pats can't cover a spread any better than Giselle Blumpkin can cover the fact that Tom Brady is gay. I haven't even looked at the spread yet, and I don't have to. My money's going in the Hat, and if Rivers isn't playing I might even take the money line.

Only one road team didn't cover the spread this week... the one that had to go to Lambeau. I'll go right ahead and put my foot in it: the Packers are not just going to beat the Giants, they are going to destroy them.

BRONCODUDE said...

BRADY SPITTING BLOOD?? ITS GONNA BE MORE LIKE RIVERS SPITTING CUM AT THE END AFTER TAKING IT IN THE FACE FOR 60MINS. LETS SEE HIM TALK SHIT WHILE SEAU'S SHOVING HIS MEMBER SO FAR DOWN HIS THROAT THAT HE'LL LOOK LIKE SEAU'S CONJOINED TWIN! FUCKIN PUNK. I'D LOVE TO TAKE A SNOW SHOVEL TO HIS GRILLE...
again, congrats s.d.-
but, FUCK RIVERS!

Anonymous said...

Norv Turner: Brett Favre's only chance to win another Super Bowl

T.O. said...

At least (sniff) Favre still has a chance (whimper... sob).

LEAVE BRIT... er, TONY ALONE!

Fletch said...

That Owens is one gay motherfucker. Crying at a press conference - ha!

- Jeff Garcia

flohtingPoint said...

I've just become a temporary Giants fan. After thinking about, there is no higher disgrace that the Pat's can suffer than having their perfect year ruined by a human menstrual cycle like Eli Manning. I seriously dont care if afterwards, Eli stars in every other commercial that his brother is not in, it would be so worth it...

WCT said...

Yes, you lost Terrell Owens, but don't go kill yourself over it. Same goes for you, Dungy offspring.

Nice to see lil hater is back...

NFL Adam said...

I heard something funny on Jim Rome's show ... Wade Phillips should have started Rob Johnson. Oh wait, that didn't work, either.

Diane said...

Jessica Simpson has replaced Hillary Clinton as the most hated woman in Texas.

Go Chargers!!!

DAWUSS said...

In case anyone's curious, Tony Dungy gave a press conference which was similar to Brett Favre's from a few years back, where there was all this media attention just to say he didn't know if he was going to retire. Only difference was, Dungy snuck more religious references into it than when Favre did it.


And they pre-empted good programming to display it too...


And also, my word verification was "mzekembn" which, IIRC, was what Philip Rivers shouted to my fellow Hoosiers after the final turnover on downs.

Hines Ward said...

yeah, what kind of ass clown cries in a post game press conference?

Tommy Tuck Rule said...

Hey Adam, why did you use a picture from Issac Hayes' press conference denouncing South Park's Scientology episode?