Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Oh Great, Media Day

Remember when Media Day was just sort of crazy? The event was kind of a circus, but people actually did some reporting back in the day. Now, everybody seems intent on just reporting the "zaniness" that is happening on Media Day. In other words, it's just a bunch of reporters talking about how crazy they are. Kind of like that dude in your office who has to talk about the bitchin' raging parties that he used to go to in college. Now it's a bunch of news agencies sending idiots to Media Day to act like idiots, and then sending other wacky reporters to report on how kooky their previous wacky reporter was.

Or something like that.

The whole notion of reporting on "the scene from Media Day" was actually put to bed by Tim Polzer when he dropped the mother of all Media Day stories back in the early part of this decade. (Sorry the NFL.com archives are kind of spotty.)

Randy Moss was sitting on the podium on Tuesday, spilling his guts about how he used to angry at football. How he had been waiting ten years for the opportunity. Moss was real and emotional.

So obviously he was ignored.

Instead, some broad in a wedding dress was trying to con Tom Brady into marrying her. Listen, Bridget Moynahan went to the trouble of getting knocked up and even then, she couldn't hold on to Brady. Showing up in a wedding dress isn't going to help.

Or what about this gem from Michael Strahan? "Jeff Feagles is so old, that when he punts, he farts dust."


Why isn't he camping out for Last Comic Standing with the other comics? The worst part in all of this is that some sports writers laughed at this. Unbelievable.

Somebody did try to get some gap-tooth smack going with Strahan, asking who has the bigger gap in his tooth, him or David Letterman?

"SpongeBob does," he countered. "And don't forget Lauren Hutton and Madonna! Trust me, all the gap-tooth people, we stick together."

Uh, no Esther Rolle drop? Now that would have been funny. But farts dust ... that gets sports writers every time.

Next year for Media Day, it would be awesome if somebody showed up and did some actual reporting without mentioning what was going on. Maybe somebody will have something insightful to say. But you can't really count on it. When the league's official site is running Strahan's fart jokes, you know that the situation has gotten out of hand and there is no chance of it ever recovering.


DAWUSS said...

Lil' Hater, Conrad Bain, and The Hatriot couldn't find a blimp on Media Day?

... at least that's the impression you get after reading this entry

Chris said...

even if people asked "real" questions, we'd still get the same lame responses.

and at least that reporter was hot.

Bain said...

... some broad in a wedding dress was trying to con Tom Brady into marrying her... Showing up in a wedding dress isn't going to help.

Unless the wedding dress has a big, hairy cock hanging out the bottom.

Bain said...

Hater, if you need to delete the above comment, I understand.

It just sort of fell out, as they are want to do.

flohtingPoint said...

Excellent choice going for that low cut wedding dress. Way to show off the rugged wasteland that was once your chest but now has molted into battlefields of skin cancer.

flohtingPoint said...

Good God man, its like a train-wreck. I keep surfing back here to look at that pick... Honestly, if you cut the head off that picture and asked me to guess who it belongs to, I'd have to go with Magda from There's Something About Mary.

NFL Adam said...

Bain, you're on notice.

Dawuss, you might want to pretend that you've never heard of Lil' Hater.

Chris is right, the reporter is attractive, but I have to side with FP that she should stay out of the sun for a while.

farley said...

I would still put it in her fart tank!

Just saying!

Diane said...

Her dress is a tab bit what we gals like to call "ill fitting". That, and she thinks her tanorexia is set off nicely by wearing white.