Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Whoa, flash backs

Somebody should have warned Tank Johnson that Texas no longer allows gun racks and open containers in cars anymore. And just because George Bush has moved on to be America's problem, they still execute black men whom they find with guns. So maybe this wasn't the best move.

The deal does make sense from the Cowboys perspective, a team best known for living in the past. Having a guy like Johnson is now the closest the team has been to the old Cowboys who had run amok in Irving back in the early 1990s. Jerry Jones has reached into the nostalgia bank, much like you do when you drunkenly purchased C&C Music Factory's "Gonna Make You Sweat" on iTunes. Jones is probably thinking this move is a lot more practical than having Tommy Agee show back up at Valley Ranch wearing a pair of Zubaz and sporting a high-top fade. Combine this with O.J. Simpson being in trouble again and who else can't control the urge to grab a Crystal Pepsi right now?

Sure they tried to recapture that magic with Terrell Owens, but the old Cowboys would be more likely to have a hooker overdose on drugs, rather than one of its star receivers. Seriously, Michael Irvin always knew what kind of drugs he was putting in his body.

Props to you Jerry, now everybody dance now.

11 comments:

WCT said...

Its tank JOHNSON not tank williams

Tommy Tuck Rule said...

Seriously the errors in the posts lately are more out of control than the 90s Cowboys. Do you need me to back you up again? Maybe write a few jokes for you?

Fletch said...

Williams, Johnson, Jackson - don't all black people have the same last name?

Anonymous said...

Would be willing to bet they drop him after the bears play them this week.

Yiddish Steel said...

Uhh... The State of Texas executes convicted, criminals that use firearms, legally or illegally purchased in the act of a capital crime, no matter what color they are. Take a good look at this year's Huntsville Honor Roll and you'll notice that Whitey and Brownie have taken the needle just as frequently as Blackie has.

No Brumski said...

At least they're using needles now. When GW was governor they were still dragging those guys behind pickups at 75 MPH.

NFL Adam said...

I have to agree with Tommy Tuck Rule here. I wish I had a job that required me to work only 12 hours a week, instead of the 70 I'm putting in now. Life would be easier if I could coast through a b.s. job, working catering on the side, and using butter as a beverage.

DAWUSS said...

You mean you haven't figured out a way to generate cash off this blog?

Diane said...

Our first mistake was not just voluntarily vacating the Alamo. Texas has been nothing but an infected thorn in the side of the country since then.

Anonymous said...

Where is the big brother update?

Fletch said...

Shit, even I'm generating cash from my much less-trafficked blog. I think I'm up to a dollar now.

Retirement looms.