Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Super Bowl Buzz Kill: Cowboys

Your team isn't going to the Super Bowl, so why have any optimism? The Hater Nation brings you back to reality with the Super Bowl Buzz Kill. Why your team won't win the Super Bowl:

The Dallas Cowboys

Good news Cowboys fans, the last time that O.J. Simpson was acquitted of a major crime (1995), your team went on to win the Super Bowl. The bad news, of course, is that O.J. is not going to get away with it this time. The really bad news is that Jerry Jones is still your owner.

The worse news is that T.O. is still on your team. Sure, things are going great for T.O. and Wade Phillips right now as they are seen holding hands on the sidelines. But that festering, petulant T.O. is still simmering below the surface?

As a fellow malcontent, it will always be a matter of time before something or someone pisses you off enough to shoot off your mouth, no matter how hard you try. Being a jerk comes second nature, much like breathing, and try as you might to stop it, you can’t. Tony Romo is taking good care of T.O. right now. But one bad game or a few drop balls and the real T.O. will come out.

Just like O.J. Simpson this past weekend.


OJ said...

All I did was ask them to give me my shit back.

Tony Homo said...

T.O. won't come out no matter when he experiences drop[ped] balls