Thursday, August 09, 2007

Super Bowl Buzz Kill: Steelers

Your team isn't going to the Super Bowl, so why have any optimism? The Hater Nation brings you back to reality with the Super Bowl Buzz Kill. Why your team won't win the Super Bowl:

The Pittsburgh Steelers

The Steelers are one of those old-school teams that seem to do things the right way. The Steelers, much like the blue-collar workers that root for the team, are nothing more than a bunch of no-nonsense guys who just want to play football. Hell, they don't even have cheerleaders.

Though, if you have ever seen Pittsburgh broads, that might make sense to you.

But the Steelers have finally jumped off the deep end by introducing a new mascot, get this, Steely McBeam. No seriously, that's the name of the new mascot. Steely looks like some sort of knock-off Simpsons' character or something. There is nothing that will anger the Football Gods more than a lame mascot, especially for a team rich in history like the Steelers. Hope you enjoyed your run, guys.


Signal to Noise said...

What they should have done was add cheerleaders, not a mascot.

BCP said...

Lost your writers, Adam? Good jokes.

bucky said...

Couldn't they just borrow Purdue Pete? They wouldn't even have to change the color of his outfit.

Diane said...

I prefer to think of Steely as an homage to Rocky Bleier

Fletch said...

Someone else said it first, but where's his mustache?

This is easily the gayest thing the Steelers have ever done, outside of drafting Kordell Stewart.

Their new unis suck, too.

NFL Adam said...

I still can't decide if the mascot reminds me of "Springy" the Springfield Olympic mascot, or one of the iron workers that appear in the McRibwich commercial. Maybe a little of both.