Friday, July 27, 2007

Super Bowl Buzz Kill: Vikings

Your team isn't going to the Super Bowl, so why have any optimism? The Hater Nation brings you back to reality with the Super Bowl Buzz Kill. Why your team won't win the Super Bowl:

The Minnesota Vikings

The Vikings would have won three out of the last four Super Bowls if the game was played in September. First-year coach Brad Childress followed in the footsteps of the departed Mike Tice by racing out to a 4-2 record last year, before finishing the season 6-10.

Hey, that’s the Vikings way.

The Vikings do have one thing going for them, a strong running game backed by a great offensive line and running back Chester Taylor. So the team went out in the draft and pick a, uh, well, a running back. No knock on Peterson, but the Vikings remember that Tavarias Jackson is the quarterback, right? Well, not that it matters much seeing that the receivers are Bobby Wade and Troy Williamson, who led the team with 11 drops last season. In fact, the Vikings are so enamored with fast guys who can't catch, they took Sidney Rice in the second round.

Hey Vikings, any reason you might want to address that horrible defensive line? You know, the one that finished 25th in sacks. (Although in fairness to the Vikings, you might be better letting the NFC North quarterbacks throw, seeing an interception is more likely than a completion.)

Still, it looks like another bad season for the Vikings. Which might be a good thing for them, so they won't have to endure something like this:

Listen

8 comments:

mutoni said...

that call made my day. hilarious!

Tommy Tuck Rule said...

You haven't even picked Chester Taylor for your fantasy league yet and you are already swinging from his jock. Nice.

Anonymous said...

1) The team's head coach is Brad Childress.

2) Didn't T.O. lead the NFL in drops last year?

NFL Adam said...

Wait, the Vikings aren't coached by the former Oilers lineman? They are doomed.

The Cowboys also have a lock on their drop stats. T.O. leading the league makes a lot of sense. I know Troy led the Vikes in drops, so I'll make the switch to club leader.

DAWUSS said...

You coulda posted a pic of their cheerleaders since it IS Friday...

Anonymous said...

Turn the sound down asshole.

The Big Picture said...

two things:

1. dawuss makes a lot of sense.

2. they'd probably be better off instilling the triple option in Vikings land. Jackson isn't exactly, ya know, a franchise QB. ugh, bring back culpepper?

DAWUSS said...

Culepper should have went to Atlanta.



... BTW, they took down all the Vick jerseys on NFL.com and you can't make a customized Vick jersey either ("Vick" and "Mexico" get rejected)