Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Steroids and Merriman Forever Synonymous

A player has never been more linked to roids since George Brett battled hemorrhoids in the early 1980s. Shawne Merriman will eternally be linked with steroids if the "Merriman Rule" passes. There are rumors that players will be banned from the Pro Bowl if they fail a substance abuse test.

Perfect. Sure Leonard Little might have murdered a woman by driving drunk, and a certain NFL owner might have drowned her husband to gain control of the team. But let’s be sure to keep Merriman out of the Pro Bowl if he fails a drug test. Maybe the NFL ought to concern itself with keeping the Cincinnati Bengals out of jail. Well, not that any of their guys are a threat to reach the Pro Bowl.

And maybe it is time for the NFL to require some players to take steroids. Like Rex Grossman for instance. The NFL should force the Chicago Bears to juice up Grossman so he might play a little harder. Not that it would hurt.

Maybe if the NFL was serious about sending a message to Merriman, they would refuse to sell his jersey and make money off his image. But we all know that will never happen and it also gives a good look at just how seriously the NFL views its drug policy.

8 comments:

PTPers10 said...

Whoa, someone was a little sensitive to the whole steroid/Pro Bowl issue. It was almost like you had some type of enhanced mood swing.....Wait, wait a minute. Now it all makes sense.

West Side Slant said...

Rex Grossman doesn't need 'roids, or HGH to make that rubber wing of his stronger. He needs bionics.

Rex Grossman: Quarterback. A man barely alive.

"We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better...stronger...faster.
Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world’s first bionic QB. Rex Grossman will be that man. Better than he was before. Better…stronger…faster.”

Zach Landres-Schnur said...

what happens when a bengal gets arrested and caught with 'roids? bad news, Adam.

Anonymous said...

Merriman. Really? I have two words that will be always synonymous with the 'roids: Lyle Alzado.

DAWUSS said...

I thought steroids were synonymous with the New York Yankees...

Conrad Bain said...

Pills and powders, baby. Powders and pills.

NFL Adam said...

we met this chick that looked like Elizabeth Shue and we got bruised.

Anonymous said...

Whats more hilarious-the pussy owner of this site getting sand in his gaping vagina over the shauna merriroid rule, or his failure to slam ferriman against the wall like he would ANY OTHER nfl player caught doing the same thing?


What a gushing twat.