Sunday, September 03, 2006

Super Bowl Buzz Kill

Why your team won’t win the Super Bowl:

When it comes to the Super Bowl, the Bengals are more cursed then Vincent Price’s Tiki idol. Never mind the fact that the Bengals have faced the best quarterback in Super Bowl history in both trips to the big game. There is always something that seems to go wrong for the Bengals.

The Bengals couldn’t hold onto the ball in Super Bowl 16, Stanley Wilson decided to pull a Dave Chappelle the night before Super Bowl 23 and Tim Krumrie broke his leg (in Theisman-like fashion) during the game. So when Carson Palmer was injured during the opening minutes of the Bengals playoff loss to the Steelers, it was no surprise. In fact, if the Bengals get close to the Super Bowl again this season, expect an anvil to fall out of the sky and break Chad Johnson’s foot.

Alright, here are the gratuitous Bengals/prison jokes:

The team would have a better chance if Michael Scofield could design a way to break all of the Bengals in prison.

Heard that the team signed Paul Crewe as a backup quarterback.

Happy now?

Other previews: Jets, Browns, Texans, Vikings, Jaguars, Bills, Eagles, Bears, Buccaneers, Chiefs, Falcons, Raven, Titans, Lions, Giants, Saints and Panthers.

1 comment:

Diane said...

Hey - but I was thinking of taking Cincy to win it all in one of the pools where you have to pick Super Bowl winner now . . . if only I'd paid attention in the pre-season . . .