Friday, April 28, 2006

The Weak Ender!

We are just mere hours away from one of the most anticipated television events of the season. A time to turn off the phone, shut down the computer, kick the dog off the couch, and prepare for hours of sheer genius.

Yep, the Daytime Emmy Awards are set for Friday night, to be hosted by The Hater Nation favorite, Kelly Monaco.

You didn't think we were talking about the NFL Draft, did you? Monaco or Chris Berman, that isn't even a contest. The NFL Draft is one of the worst television events of the year. It is going to take around two hours to see how badly the Raiders are going to jeopardize the future of the franchise with a misguided selection. Speaking of the Raiders, the sincere hope is that the Raiders are saddled with Vince Young, who tested just above "sea urchin" in his Wonderlic test. The fear is that the Raiders land Matt Leinart. The hope is that Mr. Heisman lands with the Birds down at No. 10. Could you imagine, Leinart apprenticing under future Hall of Fame quarterback Kurt Warner?

Needless to say, we’ll read all about it Sunday morning because there is no way that you can blow a perfect Southern California Saturday watching this nonsense. Seriously. And we love the NFL. But there is no need to apologize that the NFL Draft is the biggest non-event in the history of sports.

  • Tampa Bay prospect Delmon Young was suspended for tossing a bat at an umpire during a minor league game. Unfortunately, that umpire was not Doug Eddings. It seems the sporting world is getting a little too worked up over Young tossing a bat at a "scab" umpire. If the only thing the umpire has had tossed at him is a bat, he should consider himself lucky. And speaking of Eddings, the Chicago White Sox return to Anaheim this weekend. Do you think when A.J. Pierzynski's wife catches him cheating, does he just start running away like nothing happened?

  • Did the Lakers clinch their open-round series with the Suns the other night? It sure seems like it, listening to local sports talk shows. Bummer about the Clippers on Thursday.

  • It looks more and more like Terry is going to be unstoppable in Survivor. At least until he won a brand new Yukon. The person who wins the car challenge almost assuredly will lose the overall contest. It’s a fate worse than being on the cover of Madden football.


Charles Woodson signed a deal with the Green Bay Packers. It was a tough decision for Woodson, who also considered signing with Minnesota, Chicago, and Detroit just for the opportunity to catch Brett Favre's interception number 278. Woodson passed up a chance to become the Eric Show of the NFL. That's selfless.

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Zach Landres-Schnur said...

a few things:

1. the draft is not uncool. in fact it is really cool. we'll be live blogging it -- you should stop by, hang out, and play the NFL Draft drinking game with us.

2. is that picture of kelly monaco? i don't know who she is, but i plan to fingerblast her.

3. terry is cool. courtney is the most obnoxious bitch ever to be put on tv. and danielle is hot and has fake jugs (you know, my style) but that boston accent is nauseating.

Seitz said...

Hey, lay off Eric Show. We don't get too many Highlanders (emphasis on high) in the major leagues.