Thursday, January 05, 2006

Media Advisory

For Immediate Release

Contact: James Whitfield IV
Goodwill Industries
1103 Figueroa Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90045
Phone: 800-Help-Now

Post-Rose Bowl Regulations for Goodwill Drop Offs

Goodwill Industries, while appreciative of those who want to help out, have now started enforcing specific rules at Los Angeles and Orange County-area Goodwill collection centers. The following items will no longer be accepted, effective immediately:

  • Reggie Bush and Matt Leinart USC football jerseys
  • USC car flags
  • USC house flags
  • USC Three-Pete T-Shirts
"We appreciate any item that citizens would like to donate to Goodwill," Whitfield said. "But since the Trojans choked in the Rose Bowl, our collection centers have been inundated by various socialites dumping loads of USC paraphernalia and clothing. We haven't seen a run like this since the Lakers lost to the Pistons in the NBA Finals."

Whitfield, in an effort to stem the flow of USC junk, pointed out that USC had a good recruiting class, along with a lot of returning talent. So he implores those not to jump off the band wagon just yet. But the news has not reached everybody as all of the fashionable homeless in Newport Beach are wearing USC jerseys this morning.

"This town loves a winner. And only a winner," Whitfield said.

In lieu of donating USC clothing, Goodwill has asked that you stop by the Hater Nation Forums.

1 comment:

Bob the Bum said...

It's even worse out here in Vegas. The Golden Gate is offering a free USC jersey with the purchase of a $2.99 shrimp cocktail. If you buy the 99-cent shrimp cocktail, they give you two.

What about shoes? They got any red and yellow pants? Hey, don't throw that drink away, buddy. I'll take it.