Friday, January 13, 2006

Bryant Upset Over Latest Loss

LOS ANGELES Star player Kobe Bryant exploded at his teammates moments after the Lakers beat the Cavaliers, 99-98, at Staples Center on Thursday night. Bryant was heard screaming in the clubhouse and allegedly broke a television monitor and tossed a couple of chairs—one projectile narrowly avoided Chris Mihm as he walked out of the shower.

Bryant had assembled the team to notify them that the Lakers actually lost on Thursday night, despite what the scoreboard said. Bryant informed that team that because LeBron James personally outscored him, 28-27, he was going to petition the league to have the game counted as a Lakers loss.

"I don't know why these guys are so giddy," Bryant said. "They had a good view of the scoreboard from the bench, and they could see [James] had more points. I’ve told these guys, if you want to win a ring, go play for somebody else. I have three. This is all about me and winning a scoring title."

The Lakers captain then motioned over to Lamar Odom and said, "It is hard to win a game with idiots on our team. Not only did [Odom] he shoot the ball too much, but that moron was celebrating after I made that last second shot. I mean, he needs to commit a foul so I can get one more chance to beat James. But he was out mugging for the crowd.

"Because of [Odom], even Zydrunas Ilgauskas scored more than me [29]. Ain't nobody coming to the Staples Center to see that cracker Ziggy Iguana.”

Odom nearly missed a triple-double finishing with 20 points, 10 rebounds, and nine assists. Odom had plenty of opportunities, but Bryant missed twelve shots—a couple that looked a little fishy.

Asked if he would miss a shot to keep Odom from a triple double, Bryant just smiled and said, “That would learn him.”

Is Kobe Bryant a jackass? Give us your take in the Hater Nation Forums.


Anonymous said...

This wasn't funny yesterday, either.

Zach Landres-Schnur said...

Apparently anonymous doesn't appreciate good satire.

I watched the end of that game and Kobe looked like he was about to do something beat up his teammates or something.

Anonymous said...

your a jackass. . . .but then again so am i, so i thought it was pretty friggin funny. . .