Monday, December 19, 2005

FRAVD!

Brett Favre sure seems to be having a lot of fun on the football field. Brett Favre plays football the way it is supposed to be played. Brett Favre created Heaven and Earth in sixth days, and on the seventh day he reached down and had a pass interception.

These are just a few of the superlatives that will be tossed around by John Madden about Favre on Monday night. The dude needs to retire once and for all so we can stop hearing phrases such as, “This could be the last time Brett Favre throws a game-crippling, drive-killing, season ending interception.”

Instead of worrying about putting some talent around Favre, how about giving the poor Packers roster an NFL quarterback that can complete a pass to his own team. They talk about Kyle Orton killing the Bears, what has Favre done to the Packers this season? At least Orton has his team on the verge of the playoffs.

With that, we give you ten of the greatest Favre moments of all-time for those of us that recognize the former Southern Miss quarterback as one of the league’s most overrated. If Trent Dilfer had Favre’s publicist, he would be looking forward to a Pro Football Hall of Fame induction.

10. Favre passes for 331 yards and 2 interceptions in the Packers 27-17 drubbing to the Cowboys in a 1993 NFC Divisional Playoff Game. Favre starts a string of playoff futility that will last a long number of years until the salary cap and Jerry Jones ego finally destroys the Cowboys dynasty.

9. Favre passes for only 194 yards as Chris Boniol defeats the Packers on Monday night, 21-6, in 1996. Religious guy Reggie White starts a fight on the field following the game as Boniol tied a record for most field goals in a game (seven). That's the Packers, classy in defeat.

8. Favre passes for 211 yards and 1 interception as the Packers again fall to the Cowboys in a 1994 NFC Divisional Playoff Game.

7. Favre passes for 256 yards and 3 touchdowns in the Broncos stunning 31-24 victory in Super Bowl XXXII. The game might not have been Favre’s fault. But Favre must now join the list of one-time Super Bowl quarterbacks with Dilfer, Mark Rypien, Brad Johnson and Jeff Hostetler. And Jake Plummer trails by only one.

6. Favre passes for 307 yards and 3 touchdowns against Dallas in the 1995 NFC Championship Game. But his two interceptions, including a back-breaker to Larry Brown (foreshadowing Super Bowl XXX?), cost the Packers the game. Again.

5. Favre finally advances to the Super Bowl. But only after a second-year expansion team—led by Kerry Collins—does all of the heavy lifting. Favre might not have a ring if not for Carolina and Collins, who has more playoff wins over the Cowboys.

4. Favre admits in a Playboy interview that he picks vicodin out of his vomit and retakes them. Millions of fat Wisconsinites no longer embarrassed about free-basing ranch dressing.

3. The Packers have never lost a playoff game at home in the club's proud history. At least until Mike Vick shows up and beats Favre’s Packers, 27-7, in 2002. Favre throws two interceptions in the loss.

2. The Packers now have trouble winning home football games at Lambeau Field thanks to Favre. Mike Tice leads the Vikings (who play in a dome) into Green Bay and they beat up Favre and the Packers, 31-17 in 2004. Favre tosses four interceptions.

1. Critics always like to say that Favre gives the Packers a puncher’s chance in the playoffs. Yeah, right. Favre throws six interceptions against the St. Louis football in the 2001 playoffs. Too bad the puncher is Peter McNeeley

4 comments:

TJ Rubely said...

I'll only say this: for the owner of this site to be running fat jokes is only slightly less ridiculous than Mama Cass Elliot giving instruction on the Heimlich Maneuver.

Ronald Mexico said...

After the Ravens drubbing of Favre on Monday night, Joe Theismann was still seen giving fellatio to Favre in the locker room.

Kyle Orton's Neckbeard said...

Is it me or is it hot in here?

Lance Rentzel said...

Favre ate pain pills after he vomitted them up? That's disgusting. Packer fans should be asham...

Oh, man, look at that 10-year-old hottie over there. I'm gonna show her my junk!